Shingeki no kyojin eps 1-7

WARNING: spoilers ahead.

HOLY SHIT. Is all I can say about this show. The story follows Eren a crazy eyed passionate boy, his awesome kick ass friend Mikasa

 and his awesome(kind of) smart friend Armin.

They live in a world were humans have been driven to live inside a huge fort by these sexy ass titans.

who are also Colgate models in their off time

They all live peacefully-ish until one day Muscular-system-anatomical-model-titans decide they wanna come in and make a hole in the wall to let in all these naked potato looking titans in to graze, except instead of grass, they eat humans. They kill almost everyone including Eren's mom, but our heroes get to safety. Eren vows to kill all the Titans and joins the Army.

that's Eren's mom it's holding

Fast forward some 5 years and our heroes have grown and become soldiers. They graduate at the top of their class (not Armin though) and they join the Kick-Titan-Butt branch of the army. On their first day on the job though and completely coincidentally, Muscular-system-titan is back after 5 years of chillin' in his titan crib. But wait, our hero Eren has been waiting all these years for this moment so he's not about to let it pass, he's been training all his life for this one moment of glory, to finally attain revenge for what they did to his mother, to destroy the titans and free the humans from their prison  to learn what awaits him outside the walls that have kept him safe all his life! oh wait, no he gets his ass handed to him and then a titan pops him into his mouth like a skittle. Shucks!
Basically, every single battle up to episode 7 goes a little like this:

Let's get 'em guys!

lol, nope.

Not to worry though, we forgot to mention that Eren is the fucking hulk, so...yeah, he goes full on sexy titan and kicks butt. 

He's a butterface.

Vampire Knight Manga Ending spoilers (kind of)

So you're about to dive into the last chapter of your favorite vampire romantic dramedy are you? well here's a few nuggets of wisdom just so you're not caught off guard:

There's a group hug!
Yuki gets her cake and eats it too, the whore.
Everybody dies at some point.
The bad guy in the dreadlocks from Twilight makes a guest appearance.

All kidding aside I was actually pretty satisfied. Hino-Sensei knew when to end it. I would have hated it if the story dragged. The ending was poignant and showed us just enough. We get to see all of the characters we have grown to love get their endings, which are mostly kind of bittersweet, in particular our main trio's.

 Also, for a little experiment, go back to the first chapter and check out how much her art has progressed
since then. It's pretty amazing. I always feel a little sad when a series I love ends, like it left a little hole in my heart, but I'm glad it ended the way it did :) May your thirst be quenched! (is that really the last line? Was that your handy-work scanlators?)

Hataraku Maou-Sama! 7

Once more, nothing that interesting goes down, so here's a list of the  most important points:

1.There;s a new neighbor and obviously like any self respecting side character should, she has the hots for Maou, so now Emi, Chiho, cute new neighbor and Ashiel will be battling it out for Maou's heart, who will come out victorious?

2. Ashiel gets sick :////

3. Emi' s is still crazy as ever, stalking Maou and being a hater and a wet blanket in general. She receives magic vitamins that will allow her to use her sacred angel-child powers. So now we've got a crazy hater with readily available magic sword powers.

I'm getting really good with the snipping tool

4. Emi gets attacked by purple eyed demon at the 7-eleven, he can block her magic sword attacks and has laser eyes.

And a scythe, we're fucked y'all

Hataraku Maou-Sama 6

Can you say Fillahhh!?
Maou gets pumped over eating some grilled fleshy things.

A postcard from the hot ass landlady has terrifying consequences.

 Emi takes on an anatomical model.

Maou, Ashiel and Chiho go uncover the seven mysteries of her high school at night in hopes there will be a gate where Maou can replenish his powers. but it just turns out they're on an errand to get Lucifer's (rechristened Urushiyama) Psp, What a Twist!
There's lols and cute moments, but no actual plot gets told. Except for some creepy foreshadowing and some Ente Isla crazy talk. so you know, Fun. Also this happens.

what's the japanese word for cunt, subbers?

Suisei no Gargantia 1

Okay so Ledo is a soldier in a socially complex, futuristic world where humans have traveled to space in order to take over the universe and destroy anyone who opposes. He's about to retire to Avalon(the homeland) where he will be free to "sleep eat drink and reproduce freely",according to his meccha, Tomokazu Sugita. So that's cool right? In his last fight against this huge pink alien flower.

 His battalion is cornered and must retreat but they have to wait for the take-me-home black hole to activate 120 seconds, or five minutes in anime time. During this time the leader sacrifices himself to get everyone home safely but something goes wrong and Ledo gets sucked into a black hole that is definitely not the take-me-home black hole.
We Abruptly cut to a workshop type place, where Amy,

a Pocahontas cosplayer is running around being all happy and shit. Her friend, blond mechanic is in the middle of trying to dismantle an unknown machine that just so happens to be Sugita-San. Meanwhile, inside of Sugita, Ledo is chillin out, trying to figure out what the hell's going on, we find out six months have gone by and that Ledo was frozen in his sleep. He has landed in what seems to be a primitive land of people's who's job it is to fish our galactic trash, dimantle it and reuse it. But apparently Sugita is indestructible, all the mechanics give up and call it a day. So Ledo gets out and starts exploring and whatnot, not counting on Amy's interpretation of the phrase "I'll be back tomorrow" really meant "I'll be back tomorrow, like the second it turns tomorrow". So Blond Fellow and Amy are back in the workshop and Blondie notices something came out of Sugita. And Bam! Ledo takes Amy hostage and runs away!

 He has Sugita use google translate for a bit. Molests Amy, and goes outside. Only to be amazed that what he is seeing is not the infinite confines of space. Flying squirrel attacks his face and Amy gets away. Ledo is cornered by the other inhabitants of this strange land so Ledo has no choice but to call on Sugita to come to his aid. And that's when we find out that this strange land is Earth, the birthplace of human kind that was only thought to be a legend. Oh SHIET! what a grand old surprise.

I like this, I dig it, this is the 2013 version of Pocahontas, I can tell. The visuals are nice and Scify-ish as they should be and the character designs are lovely. The establishing stuff all first episodes do was pretty solid.

Hataraku maou sama ep 5

What happens in this episode? Epicness that's what! we pick  up from last episode with Maou, Emilia and Ashiel's encounter with Lucifahhh, one of Maou's  generals who has come to this world to I guess fuck shit up cause an old bald guy told him he would send him back to heaven if he did.The old guy is apparently one of Emilia'a allies so the betrayal comes as a real shock to her

 Anywhoo Lucifer has kidnapped the only kidnappable person in this show: Chiho-chan, and with his crazy devil powers he fucks shit up fairly efficiently, But wait, you say, how is he using his powers if they don't work in this world?. To which I reply: well my dear reader, it seems like demon power comes from people's feelings of despair and fear, duh. Knowing this,  Maou heads to a place with lots of distressed people hang out at, and feeds off their pain as opposed to what Lucifer did, create his own distress to gain power  which is pretty nice of him and it definitely scores brownie points with Emilia. So Maou turns into ripped goat feet Maou and levitates some shit.

Like so...

 Emilia pulls out her sword and Ashiel runs home to get his cape and so the fight is on! Obviously they kick some Lucifer and bald guy butt, and rescue Chiho who still likes Maou after finding out he has goat feet and horns, and two of Emilia's allies show up late to the party and solve the mystery of why Chiho-chan hears voices and feels earthquakes. And All's well that ends well.

Also, from the best dying words archive:

Uta-Pri 2000% episode 3

OK, so this episode focuses on Syo (Shou, Shyo?) the cute one. If you're not up to date with last season of Uta-Pri, Sho-chan hates his girly demeanor and wishes to be a manly man, like his idol high-school teacher, Hyuuga Sensei. Well Sho lands a role playing a medieval Chip n' Dale's dancer along his long admired teacher.

he oozes man.

But when he goes to greet him, he gets denied, so when a challenge appears, he is sure to take it and prove that asshole of a manly teacher wrong. The challenge being doing his own stunt to jump to the other side of a broken bridge. And of course, he fails miserably, but being the hardworking main protagonist (for one episode) that he is, he will not give up. So he spends the night practicing, and since he forgot his gym bag at home, leave it to our dear sweet heroine to bring it to him. Coincidentally, she ends up on the other side of the bridge, and Coincidentally, she is afraid of heights, and COINCIDENTALLY, the gym bag falls and for some physically impossible reason, Nanami ends up holding on to the ledge of the bridge for dear life, and in a moment straight out of the Dark Knight Rises, Sho, makes that do-or-die, no harness required leap into the abyss in order to save the one he loves. 

he named his move, maximum manliness, no biggie

So he saves her and she whimpers for a bit and all's well that ends well, he now has the confidence to make the jump during recording and Manly-Sensei recognizes him as a man.

Oh, and Principal-who-tries-too-hard tells them they're not idols yet until they win the Uta-Pri award or something, so i guess we have something like a plot now.

Aku no Hana 1-4

       If you're looking for a smart show that's kind of creepy and fun all at the same time, Aku no Hana should be your cup of tea. It's based off of Claude Baudelaire's poem anthology les fleurs du mal. Which according to Wikipedia is all about letting your inner sicko loose and committing sexy sins.

       The show follows Kasuga Takao, a book nerd with a huge crush on the cute, smart girl in class, Saeki Nanako. One fateful day, after school, he ends up stealing Saeki's gym uniform.
 It becomes a big deal the next day and Kasuga-kun freaks. In his mind he's become this complete sexual deviant and while we can't completely deny that, what we can say is that he is nothing compared to Nakamura, the weird girl in class who also happens to be the only witness to Kasuga's crime. And i have to say, she is some next level shit. In the first four episodes alone she calls the homeroom teacher a piece of shit, pushes Kasuga's face into Saeki's breasts, then tells him to write an essay about it, becomes livid when he doesn't, so she undresses him in the middle of the library and puts Saeki's gym clothes on him, makes him hang out with her after school by a river, sniffs her hands then sniffs his, goes to his house in the middle of the night (even though he never told her where he lived) and makes him wear he gym uniform under his clothes on his first date with Saeki. Plus she's got the creepiest smile.

Something to note about this show is definitely it's animation. It is beautiful to say the least. Every step, every smile, every motion each of the characters make is fully drawn and there is no such thing as a still shot in this show. The tones are dark and serious and the soundtrack only adds to it. There's nothing to pick at in this show, the plot is new and engaging, the characters are interesting the dialogue is smart, we have a protagonist who is oddly endearing and an antagonist who is nuts in the best of ways. We also have this:

Who is a girl

and this:

My favorite character